This could be long...............
Ok. So, when my daughter, who just graduated high school, was about 3 my father-in-law started setting up small trust funds for all of his grandchildren. He said he needed her SS# to do it but we hadn't filed it yet. When we got it done we tried to give it to him and his reply was, why would I need that? Hmmmm. We assumed he didn't need it for the trust fund after all. When my son was born 3 years later we tried again to give him the SS#'s and the reply was why would I need that? Anyway, my niece is getting married next month and we heard from her father that she cashed out her fund to help pay for it. Well, our daughter decided to go to one of the few schools that didn't offer her any money and we thought now would be a good time for her to get her trust fund too. My husband approached his father about it and was told that our children DID NOT have funds because we hadn't given him the SS#'s. Our fault......our problem. We thought well maybe they just had a savings account that they set up instead and the money would be a little less. NOPE!! NOTHING!!! All the other grandkids get a few thousand to start their adult lives. Not our kids.
I am in shock. I waited a few hours and then ripped off this email which was probably over kill since I was so fraught with emotion.
"I am in utter shock over what Doug just told me. You had savings accounts for the other grandkids but not ours? What kind of grandparent does that? How can you discriminate between some of your own flesh and blood? I don't care what your problem is with me or with Doug, you should not have taken it out on our children. Your actions are revolting. I am disgusted beyond measure. You know, Doug has always felt you loved and favored his other siblings more than him. He sure has evidence of it now, doesn't he? And don't give me any of this crap about not giving you the SS#'s. He tried to do that twice and both times you demanded to know why you would need those. If you had really wanted to do it, or really loved our children, you would have called and asked for those #'s. You are sick people. If your motive was to have me out of your life you have succeeded. I am no longer going to accept the emotional turmoil you stir up with your discriminatory behavior and nasty, cutting remarks. Not only will you have me out of your life (for which I am sure you are grateful) but you are losing a grandson who absolutely adored you. Your contact with us is now gone. If Doug chooses to speak with you that is on him alone. Sierra is an adult and can make her own decisions. You once wondered to Doug why you have problems with your daughters-in-law? Really? Think about it!!!! How do you think our children are going to feel when they find out you loved the other kids enough to give them thousands of dollars to start their adult lives but did not do the same for them? HMMMM? Oh, and they will find out, somehow. Truth always comes out. You will be exposed for what you really are. Your old song and dance about it's my money and I'll do what I want with it isn't going to fly anymore. Sure do what you want with it but don't forget you reap what you sow and you have sown a field full of thorns. I'll forgive you one day because I don't need the cankers that you cause rotting in my soul. I know we haven't had a great relationship and that you haven't liked many of the things I said or did and the feeling is more than mutual. This on the other hand is the final straw on the proverbial camels back. "
As you can see our relationship has never been great. I was the wrong girl for their boy. I wasn't submissive enough and (evil me) I had opinions that didn't match theirs.
Just sitting here still stunned.....................
I have too many blogs that I am trying to keep up with. Haven't had time to post here. If you want to follow along try this http://www.tennesseephotog.blogspot.com/ Here you can at least see what I have been up to lately.
Ok more like what a day! Sierra just came home and told me she had dented the van AGAIN! AAAAHHHHHH!!! So very frustrating. Especially since we recently raised our deductable to $1000 to save a little money. Not only that but Doug, the lead foot, got another speeding ticket. Enough of the bad stuff though.
Earlier this week I got an email out of the blue from an old friend I hadn't heard from since high school. Now, we're talking 20 years. This was a person I cared about very much and considered one of my most trusted friends. I was so excited to hear from him. What a nice surprize.
Yup you know the one................that bad news call.
Today I decided to take a nice long hot bath. I was relaxing in the jacuzzi tub when my dad knocked on my bedroom door. (by the way, Mom and Dad live at my house so this has become family headquarters and all bad news comes here first) He said, " Ya might want to get out.......there's bad news." His sister Coralee had called with news about Grandpa Q. By the time I got to him he was crying and had to hand me the phone for Coralee to tell me. Grandpa is in the hospital again. He is 87 years old. He's bound to get to that point sometime. He's been there a lot lately but this time is the worst yet. This morning he kept falling down, vomiting and had swollen hands and ankles. Maureen rushed him to the hospital. It looks like he is in congestive heart failure and kidney failure. They are rehydrating him and that has improved his kidney function but his heart is still in trouble. It has been hovering between 35 and 40 beats/min. Only once today were they able to get it up to a more normal rate of 65 but it has fallen again. His heart monitor is hooked up to the ICU monitoring unit so they can react quickly if need be. They put him into a private room and he thinks it is so all of the family can come and say goodbye before he dies. The Dr. has told him not to give up because he is pretty sure they can pull him through. The last time I saw Grandpa, in August, he kept tellimg me this was the last time I would see him alive. I assured him I would be back soon and would definately see him alive. I sure hope I am right. Please pray for him.
What's your favorite thing about being sick?
I don't know if you could call it a favorite because being sick is awful but I do enjoy the weightloss that usually accompanies a good bout of flu.
Sierra has had her best friend up for the weekend. They have been best friends for almost 5 years now. Unfortunately she still lives in Florida so they only get to see each other once or twice a year.
I really hope they are able to keep this friendship alive for many years to come. Everybody needs to have at least one close friend. Sadly, for me, I let everyone from my past slip through my fingers. I lost touch with those who meant most to me. I know why. I was ashamed of how fat I had gotten and also the financial difficulties we had when we were first married. I was so worried about being judged. I still had that small town mentality following me around. I continued to let it get worse as the years went on until I wasn't hardly able to leave my home. Tragic, I know. Luckily the weight came off and the confidence came up. That made a huge difference. It still took me years to figure out friendship again. I have now begun the process of reconecting. It's great! Today was one of those special days where friends suddenly come back into your life. I was able to reconnect with Denise. She was such a great friend to me during those turbulent teen years. I'm so glad to have found her. YAY!!! So my goal for this year is to keep contact with as many of my friends as possible. I never want to feel alone in this world.How far from your last home do you live? Why did you move and are you glad you did?
Submitted by Matthew 25.
Oh, about 500 miles. We move a lot and this has been one of the biggest adjustments we have ever had to make.
It's a new year already. How did that happen when I wasn't looking? I guess it's time for an update.
I have been shooting a lot of weddings this year and having an amazing time with these brides.
I have been able to work with some great people this year and learn some new techniques. I can honestly say that I love photography more and more with every shoot. What's fabulous is that my wedding schedule is already filling up for 2008. If you want me you'd better call now!!
This summer we were able to spend a month in Alberta. While there I attended a minilypse in Calgary and was it ever fun. There are some really fantastic people in the Istock world. This event was so well organized and had terrific models for us to shoot. I love these events and always learn something there.
I can't wait to get to my next Istockalypse. Here's hoping I get to the one in Buenos Aires.
What are you going to do with your tax return?
Submitted by KB.
Oh, that is an easy one. Pay off medical bills. Having cancer didn't kill me but the medical bills might. Being one of those sick folk and having a son with a disablity costs an unbelievable amount of cash. Too bad I don't have any. Donations anyone?

I love the image of the bride looking in the mirror - very nice! read more
on What have I been up to lately?